Note: this post was written back in Sept 2021 and I'm finally releasing it to the world now, Oct 2022,
so much has changed since getting these thoughts down, much more to share. Love and Light, Christine
We arrived back in Winnipeg mid July and less than 12 hours after touching down, we were looking at real estate to find our next home. After two unsuccessful offers on places while overseas we bid on our first viewing of 5 that day and it is now our home. I didn't feel homesick at all while in England, yet I felt homesick for England once back in Canada. My time in the UK was magical, fulfilling and a full reset.
Seeing and hugging my stepsons filled my heart, I don't think I truly knew how much I missed those young men while away. The best compliment was being told that my hug felt like a Mum hug. If you're a stepparent you know how great hearing that felt.
Another great reunion was seeing my wiggle butt. Missing pets is different as I was able to communicate, face-time and talk with family, but with my Keelo that wasn't possible. I was fortunate to get frequent updates and photos of our dog but reuniting with her was like those videos you see online of pet and owner getting together after much time apart. I wanted to video it but was too excited and forgot. She was the only thing I cried about while in England.
With the feelings of confidence, renewal and a readiness for a new start for myself in Winnipeg I was met with the reality of ageing parents and the needs of children, that incredible middle ground of life where the young and old both require focus and attention. My hopes for a restart were put on hold and I allowed my lovely, nourishing routines of the UK to quickly evaporate. After tending to my Mum for a few weeks while she recovered from back and leg issues I started working. While on a break from the city out at the cottage I got the call from my Dad that he felt he needed to go to the hospital. A much too fast drive from the lake to the city brought a 911 call and almost 2 weeks of hospital visiting and ongoing help at home. I was also registering and preparing our daughter for her first days in high school, concern about my stepsons both going through changes, my husband getting back to the demands of work heightened by return from leave and me working 2 jobs, one wasn't enough, ha. Hello Winnipeg, we're not in Kansas (insert England) anymore.
We moved into our new home in the middle of all of this, we're still not fully unpacked and settled, that's what the cold days of winter are for, right?! In the past I would have been sent into a frenzy of anxiety and depression with so much coming at me all at once. My 6 months of self exploration and belief in myself have helped me stay grounded through all the challenges and changes. I am able to recognize when I'm becoming overwhelmed and know how to take time to myself or give myself what I need to not spiral down. My husband is a rock and my daughter is so understanding and independent. So thankful our family unit manages so well. Dog cuddles, unconditional love and kisses help too.
I love our new neighbourhood, I feel like we moved somewhere new, yet familiar. It is in part of the city that both of us haven't lived in before. The house is a little over half the size of our previous home. The perfect downsizer with all the wish list items we wanted in a home. I feel so comfortable in the space, it has a great energy.
I miss the adventures of England, the constant discovering of new places and sites. I am trying to keep that feeling while learning about and exploring our new neighbourhood. Dog walks have allowed the meeting of neighbours and getting the lay of the hood. I love that my husband's commute to work is better and the proximity to our stepsons is better too. My commute to one of my part time jobs takes me back to the area of town that I grew up in, some things change yet they stay the same.
After this week I will be down to one job, much more reasonable. I'll be able to get back to creating art, writing my blog more and focusing on myself, restarting all the wonderful things that help me be the best I can be.
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